Healthy Relationships

Love Yourself (So You Can Love Others Better)

Do you love yourself? Like really see your own value and take care of yourself?

Probably not many of us could say an emphatic “Yes!” to that, could we?

I know sometimes it’d be a weak “Uhh, yeah?” in response to that question.

Truly loving ourselves means we know that we sometimes need to put ourselves in front of others and that’s hard. I think women especially have difficulty with that. We tend to put our children way ahead of ourselves and often our mates as well. We sacrifice for them. Make sure they are clothed, dressed, washed, fed…before we even think of showering or sitting down to a meal.

For many of us, that’s just our nature. We don’t even give it a second thought. Until we’re running out of physical steam and are exhausted by our schedules or sometimes, our relationships.

Do you know that’s it okay to love you enough to demand good relationships in your life?

It’s real strength to be able to say “I love myself enough to make sure you treat me well.”

Unhealthy relationships can cause emotional and physical issues. The stress and toxicity can be brutal.

We (meaning me too!) sometimes think it’s polite to accept less than excellent treatment in relationships. We excuse a lot of behaviors that we really shouldn’t. We don’t want to tell them they’re not treating us well because it might hurt their feelings. Or it might rock the boat.

Sometimes the boat gets a little rocked when we stand up for ourselves. But the old saying that we teach people how to treat us, really is true. We need to be our own best example. Show people the right way to be kind and respectful and to observe personal boundaries.

When we do those things, we can demand them in return. We can say “I treat you well. I expect the same from you.” We can be confident in saying this because we love ourselves enough to have healthy, rich relationships in our lives.

We look forward to seeing those people because there’s mutual respect, mutual appreciation, and nobody’s getting hurt or taken advantage of. When you love you well, then you can be healthy and confident and free to love those around you even better.

…because when you know how you want to be treated, you will treat others just as well.

That’s a pretty beautiful cycle to start. Don’t fear creating a safe, enriching environment for yourself. Delight in it.

We have to first love ourselves so we can love others well and love them better. Healthy relationships means happy people.

Hey, beautiful. Love yourself, okay?

signature Melanie in aqua color

 


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8 Comments

  • Reply Laura L. Padgett February 1, 2017 at 11:23 pm

    Melanie, you always, always inspire me to reach higher and be better. I am working on loving me more. I think all of us are. And in a world where we are told on a regular basis what we are not, how refreshing to remember we are worth loving ourselves.

    Many blessings,
    laura padgett

  • Reply Barbie February 1, 2017 at 11:42 pm

    So good Melanie. I will have to admit that this “loving myself” has been a life long journey. I’m better at it than I use to be, but I still manage to put myself last most of the time. Thank you for the reminder that I am worth putting myself first.
    Barbie recently posted…A Working Mom’s Homeschool Life: C – ChoicesMy Profile

    • Reply melaniespickett@gmail.com February 21, 2017 at 12:01 pm

      I’m the same, Barbie. It’s a work in progress learning to care for ourselves. 🙂

  • Reply Abbey February 2, 2017 at 11:07 am

    This is such an important truth! We love best when we know we are loved and when we love ourselves! 🙂
    Abbey recently posted…How To Plan An AWESOME Family Vacation: On A BudgetMy Profile

  • Reply Laura Starner February 3, 2017 at 9:06 am

    Melanie, this is beautiful and so true. Sometimes, this is very hard for us as women. I continue to work on this.

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