Encouragement, Life Is Beautiful

When Will We Believe We’re Worthy?

What is your worth?

When faced with this question, you likely wouldn’t throw out a dollar amount. You might even give the correct answer: “I’m priceless.”

So why don’t we live like we believe that? I have trouble embracing that truth sometimes too!

When I write and talk about self-worth and our views of ourselves, it’s because I’ve struggled with it and I know if we don’t properly value ourselves, we’re at great risk for be mistreated and facing lives of mediocrity. Neither of these things is meant for us!

We’d expect more for ourselves (demand it!) if we grasped our true value. I’ve been reading the book Worth Living” by Mary DeMuth and boy howdy, does this author get me.

“We need to reevaluate our relationships, particularly the ones that continually undermine our worth…The voices of others are powerful and when words of unworthiness are spoken over us, it’s hard to believe otherwise.”

See? She gets it, right?

Melanie S. Pickett, Mary DeMuth, Worth Living

How about this:

“The lie: I deserve to be overlooked.” 

I believed this for so long. Being overlooked is painful. It hurts. It has a sting that lasts like a scarring burn. As child and teen, I took piano lessons, nine years of them. At one of my first recitals at about age 9, I suffered a hurtful case of being overlooked. And what’s even worse, the situation occurred in public for all to witness.

At the end of the piano recital each year, our teacher would call forward students one by one and acknowledge their hard work with a certificate. Each student was recognized. As she went down the alphabetical list and quickly passed the “D’s”, my letter, I grew uncomfortable. Any second now, she’d call my name, right? But as the list of remaining students grew smaller and smaller, I could feel the embarrassment creep up my neck and cover my face. I’d been overlooked. 

As soon as the ceremony ended, I skipped the punch and cookies and told my parents I needed to go home. They allowed me to go alone across the parking lot to our home across the street, where I promptly sobbed when I reached our yard. I felt forgotten. Forgettable.

Before then and definitely after, I believed there was nothing special about me, nothing significant, and certainly nothing memorable. I was bland, regular, vanilla, quiet, insignificant.

But as the book says: “God saw. He noticed. He CHOSE me.”

As that 9-year-old little girl sat on her porch sobbing with a deep ache, God was aching at the sight of his child suffering. That wasn’t the only time I felt like a speck, useless and ignored, not by far.

Melanie S. Pickett, Mary Demuth, Worth Living

“The God who created the people who have rejected me has chosen me!” We’re chosen, friends. Chosen. Because we’re important and wanted.

This book has so many pearls like these and speaks to that little girl in me and all the places wounded by feelings of inadequacy and insignificance.  For someone like me–and perhaps you–who has some places broken by lies about our self-worth, this book meets us in the battle. The author, Mary DeMuth, has been there in the trenches of a struggle of her own. To know that someone understands those feelings has been cleansing, healing, and validating.

You can find this book at this link and remember this: (from Worth Living: How God’s Wild Love for You Makes You Worthy):

  Even when the past strangles you.

  Even when nothing you do seems to matter.

  Even when your story takes a violent turn. 

  You are living a life worth living.

 

Always…hope,

Melanie S. Pickett, blog

 

 

 

Mary DeMuth is a former church planter in France and the author of more than thirty books, including The Day I Met Jesus. A sought-after speaker and longtime blogger she has overcome (through Jesus’s healing) a difficult past to become an authentic example of what it means to live a brand-new story. She lives in Texas with her family. Learn more at www.marydemuth.com.


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10 Comments

  • Reply Christine Carter April 29, 2016 at 9:40 pm

    My heart just broke reading about your piano recital! I used to be a music teacher, and that would have just killed me to know I forgot a child! I do hope she finally realized that and made it up to you?

    I love your message here. I can read this and believe my worth, but in my every day I know I still try to PROVE it. I equate worth with productivity ALL the time. It’s so hard to strip ourselves down to the seed from which God loved us in the first place. Your book sounds incredibly inspiring!
    Christine Carter recently posted…Book Review: Multiples IlluminatedMy Profile

    • Reply melaniespickett@gmail.com May 3, 2016 at 8:40 pm

      Christine, I should probably have mentioned that a week or so later, my teacher got me a little statue of Chopin and apologized. I know she didn’t do it on purpose and I wasn’t upset with her. The feeling of being forgotten and overlooked in front of EVERYONE was really hard and hurt for awhile, even though I knew it wasn’t intentional.

      It is a wonderful book for anyone, especially speaking to those of us who struggle with self-worth (me and lots of folks). I do the same, equate my worth with how much I can get done or how much I don’t. I know better know so I’m trying to fix that. 🙂

  • Reply Leslie May 1, 2016 at 2:05 pm

    I love this because how easily we forget.
    Leslie recently posted…Beautiful and Inspiring Roof Top Garden DesignsMy Profile

  • Reply Marie May 1, 2016 at 2:28 pm

    What a great post! So many struggle with feeling like this, feeling invisible, feeling like nothing they do matters.

    Truth is it DOES Matter! Just because we don’t see the effects of our actions doesn’t mean it doesn’t matter.

    Thanks for being a voice to help others see their worth!

    @spreadingJOY
    marie

    • Reply melaniespickett@gmail.com May 3, 2016 at 8:33 pm

      Thank you so much, Marie! I felt invisible for a long time and it was so painful. I try to make sure I’m kind to everyone so they never feel that way. <3

  • Reply Channing C May 1, 2016 at 7:14 pm

    I can’t believe the piano teacher did that! I think it speaks more about her than you. It’s really hard nowadays to feel special with social media and everyone having easy access to internet fame but I’ve seen the bad side of that fame as well like this story : http://fusion.net/story/244545/famous-and-broke-on-youtube-instagram-social-media/ and I also heard amy schumer talking about how one person violated her personal space just because he felt she owed him because he’d been to watch her movies. I think not being special can have perks such as anonymity but I definitely see where you’re coming from. We all need to feel a little special sometimes.

    • Reply melaniespickett@gmail.com May 3, 2016 at 8:32 pm

      That’s a really great point, that it’s harder now to feel special. Almost anyone can be a “star” with all the reality TV, YouTube, etc. I heard that about Amy Schumer as well and now she refuses pictures with any fans. We DO need to feel special every now and again. P.S. I don’t think my piano teacher meant any harm. Looking back, I’m sure it was just a mistake but it felt horrible at the time and for quite awhile after. Maybe it still does or I wouldn’t have thought of it. 🙂

  • Reply Allison May 2, 2016 at 10:07 am

    I love this! I think we all struggle with feeling unworthy sometimes-some of us more than others, but this is so great!

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