There are several things I won’t apologize for as a domestic violence survivor. We face judgement from others no matter how long or short we stay in the dangerous relationship. We face judgement for how we choose to survive and that we should have known better than to get into said relationship in the first place. There are non-negotiables–things I won’t apologize for.
When I was in college, I had a job through work study on campus. Being a business admin major, I lucked out and got a job in the purchasing office. It wasn’t a lot of hours, maybe less than ten per week, but it put textbook and gas money in my pocket and gave me a unique experience working in a university business office.
It also gave me insight into people. I worked with three wonderful superiors there: Barb, Sharon, and Dale. They were all kind, upbeat, upstanding folks and were happy to teach me. But Sharon, she stood out. I can’t recall her exact title: she had her own office, dressed impeccably, was stunningly beautiful and elegant, a sort-of Sophia Loren of the business world. When she entered the room, everyone noticed. And she was friendly and happy and she was also independent and bold. I took note.
Last week was important for me and my family. It marked five years since something quite tragic happened to us. I shared about it here in three parts: it took that many to get the story of That Day and our lives since it, out.
How encouraging and healing that experience has been and the support was overwhelming.
I shared because when we raise our voices, others will feel empowered to raise theirs…to share their stories, to encourage others, to leave their harmful situation.
Sharing helps lessen the stigma about domestic abuse. It’s important to know that verbal, emotional, and mental abuse are every bit as much abuse and, as damaging as, physical abuse. It’s just that the scars are often invisible.
Gentleness is seen as a strong quality. In Proverbs 25:15b, “a gentle tongue can break a bone.”
Raising children is tough.
I don’t think it’s ever been easy to be a parent, but I do think that parenting now may be more of a challenge than in any other era.
As parents, we face unique difficulties that our parents and grandparents didn’t have to contend with. The internet didn’t exist in past generations and with its arrival came a whole host of issues we must now monitor, offer guidance for, and protect against.