Is there a family member who likes to verbally jab you?
Are they passive-aggressive or outright mean to you?
Do they manipulate you or try to guilt you into doing things their way?
Do they try to make you feel guilty or bad for what you’ve accomplished or lay a guilt trip in order to coerce you into doing things you don’t really want to do, or don’t have the time, money or energy to accomplish?
Teenage dating: The subject evokes excitement or perhaps angst if you’re a teenager; strikes fear into the hearts of many parents. Teenage dating tends to stir up some nostalgia, concern, and sometimes, even controversy when we enter into discussions about the when, who, why, and what of dating. It’s a hot topic and there’s nothing simple about it.
My daughter is 17 and thus far, has chosen not to date. I’m sure I had influence on this decision but so did what she witnesses in some of her peers, as well as how she feels God is guiding her. I have told my children more than once that I don’t want them getting overly involved in romantic relationships in high school. I don’t think it’s healthy and I haven’t wavered on my stance. I’ve seen in myself and in others how painfully easy it is to immerse yourself in another person, especially at these young ages where they’re (let’s be honest) ill-equipped to handle all the emotion that comes with relationships, dating, heartbreak, and the plethora of responsibilities that accompany it all. (Side note: If you’re not a Christian, these rules can still apply to you as they are a recipe for a healthy, strong relationship where you have a voice and are safe).
This week I step forth into another milestone year of my forties as I celebrate another blessed birthday. Some people squirm and cringe at the thought of their birthday creeping up; some even claim “I don’t celebrate birthdays any more.” This hurts a little when I hear it. I understand the fear of growing old and facing the sad effects of gravity on our bodies, of looking back in surprise at how much time has passed and how quickly. But every year…every breath…is a gift. When my birthday rolls around each year, I’m thankful for it. It is a bit sobering, I’ll admit, to see that I’m approaching my mid-forties when I remember fondly the days I thought thirty was ancient. But I’ve watched my parents face death. I’ve watched friends leave this world. I’ve had my own brushes with it too and I’m delighted to be here. I want to be here. I’ve got a lot to do yet and I’m grateful to be here doing it, to watch my babies grow and experience life with them and my husband.
This age is beautiful. There is an amazing liberation that comes with Forty. I say “Forty” with a capital “F” because the age is like this monument to our freedom: freedom from opinions and self-esteem downers, from giving a crap about what others think because we’ve pretty much come into our own and we’re really good with that. I wanted to share with you some lessons I’ve learned and things I’ve gained since entering my Forties.
It’s February, the month of love. For some people it’s just another month and for others, they dread it altogether. Valentine’s Day is only days away and it comes with a lot of baggage for some. Being single isn’t easy. It can be lonely, right? Days like Valentine’s Day seem to rub it in your face mercilessly. When I was suddenly single after being widowed, I had some things to learn before I could ever move on and entertain dating. I had a lot to learn about myself and it was necessary to set some firm boundaries with myself and for myself.
I wanted to share some valuable lessons I learned and dish up some food for thought.